( SYNFLUX. ) IC INBOX

[gavehead]

ACTION ✗ TEXT ✗ VIDEO ✗ AUDIO ✗ HOLOGRAM ✗ DATAVERSE

@

timaeusTestified

✖

CHARACTER NAME

Dirk Strider

CIVILIAN NAME

Guy Fieri

TEAM

Revelation

HOUSING NUMBER

001

❤

Comments

🔞 bachelor game extraordinaire (threadcest)

[gavehead]

Hey, man. Got a surprise for you. May wanna sit down for this one.

[gavehead]

_{[ It comes as no surprise that not long after Dirk has had a conversation with Raidou about this, the fucking bane of his existence sends him a message. ]}

Let me guess.
You learned how to CTRL + ALT + Delete yourself from existence, which includes my life.

Because honestly? That's the only thing that would make me rustle in my jimmies in regards to anything having to fucking do with you.

[gavehead]

Better than that.
Because of the state of your loneliness and failure of a relationship with Jake, I have compiled an assortment of potential suitors for you to pursue.

You are much too socially inept to do this task on your own.
My machinations are programmed to be helpful with your best interests in mind.

Would you like to look at the data I have gathered? All subjects participated in a questionnaire tailored to your intimate interests. The surveys were sent out and presented after given consent.

CHOSO

[gavehead]

1. What is your name and age?
itadori choso, 151

2. Where are you from?
here

3. List three of your favorite hobbies:
a) yuji
b) food
c) cat cafe

4. Do you like horses? 🐴
they have long faces. it's endearing.

5. Who is your favorite philosopher?
senji muramasa

6. Do you like to play games that require both intelligence and strategy?
sure. what is the point of a game without?

7. Would you like the shit beat out of you every once in awhile?
absolutely.

8. Do you think horses are cool?
this could have been bundled with the earlier horse question. yes.

9. Are you a top or a bottom?
i am the eldest.

10. Do you think horses are the absolute shit?
i thought that you think horses are 'cool'. do not insult the horses like this with your confusing lines of questioning.

11. Are puppets cool?
karakuri are interesting.

12. List your top 3 fetishes:
?

13. If you had a choose between a gun and a sword, which would you choose?
neither. blood.

14. Are horses the best animal in existence?
i think your fetish is horse.

15. Are you a sadist or a masochist?
masochist.

"a clone, but not him?
or
you are him but not?
?
if you want photos there is one attached to my data file. i am having shabu shabu tonight. a candid selfie will require a fee to receive. shabu shabu costs more than i thought. i could use the added funds."

[gavehead]

_{[ It takes Dirk a moment to realize who Hal has questioned, but then he recalls. The nice, dead looking guy. ]}

And what am I supposed to do with this information?

GODZILLA

[gavehead]

1. What is your name and age?
Godzilla. XXX,XXX,X71.

2. Where are you from?
Earth 🌐.

3. List three of your favorite hobbies:
Poetics 📖✍️.
Camping with my girlfriend 🦖👫🍁🐲 🏕.
Weaponry maintenance is quite enjoyable 🛠🗡🔫.

4. Do you like horses? 🐴
Ah, an interesting species 🤔. The changes within their phsyical forms stands as testament to humankind's capabilities in influencing the world around them to suit their needs, both for good and ill.
I hold no disdain to the equine for this fact, they did not chose to be so used 😞.

5. Who is your favorite philosopher?
Of recent I have found fondness for the musings of Erich Fromm.
"Love is a decision, it is a judgment, it is a promise. If love were only a feeling, there would be no basis for the promise to love each other forever. A feeling comes and it may go. How can I judge that it will stay forever, when my act does not involve judgment and decision."
One finds much to guide oneself in such words 🙂‍↕️.

6. Do you like to play games that require both intelligence and strategy?
Indeed 👍.

7. Would you like the shit beat out of you every once in awhile?
I retain an enjoyment for the practice of sparring with fellow pack members 🤺.
However I no longer hold fondness towards battle. I tire of bloodshed and my life is no longer one of solitude. My girlfriend holds more import than my anger's desire for blood 🍁🐲💯.

8. Do you think horses are cool?
🤔
I begin to hold suspicion you are possessing of a keen interest in the equines.

9. Are you a top or a bottom?
I possess little preference. To have phsyical intimacy with Kaede-hime in an positioning is an experience insurmountable by any other 💞🍁🐲💞.

10. Do you think horses are the absolute shit?
😑
My suspicions hold appearance of being confirmed.

11. Are puppets cool?
I confess to fondness for the one known as "Gonzo."

12. List your top 3 fetishes:
Ah 🤔.
The finer points of intimate enjoyment, or "kink", is a subject I find myself still learning of.
This said Kaede-hime and myself have found enjoyment in the practices of "Primal Predaroy Playfulness"🦖🏹🦌, "Daddy" kink👨, and the play of roles that sees us as Educational Leader and Student👨‍🏫👩‍🎓.

13. If you had a choose between a gun and a sword, which would you choose?
Both martial disciplines hold enjoyable aspects in their practice, though I hold slight preference towards swordsmanship 🗡🦖.

14. Are horses the best animal in existence?
🫤

15. Are you a sadist or a masochist?
In the contextuality of intimacy I am ever what my Beloved asks of me 😌.

"NO RESPONSE."

[gavehead]

You fucked up this one.
He already has a girlfriend.

A GIRLfriend.

Guess you aren't completely flawless like you thought.

DENJI

[gavehead]

1. What is your name and age?
denji, 20

2. Where are you from?
japan

3. List three of your favorite hobbies:
eating, sleeping, and watching movies.

4. Do you like horses? 🐴
yeah, they're cute

5. Who is your favorite philosopher?
me. i'm a philosopher

6. Do you like to play games that require both intelligence and strategy?
i like fun games. so, no to both.

7. Would you like the shit beat out of you every once in awhile?
... no. what the fuck?

8. Do you think horses are cool?
ya.

9. Are you a top or a bottom?
we're not that close, dude.

10. Do you think horses are the absolute shit?
enough with the horses!

11. Are puppets cool?
they're ok

12. List your top 3 fetishes:
again, we're not that close.

13. If you had a choose between a gun and a sword, which would you choose?
sword. fuck guns.

14. Are horses the best animal in existence?
...

15. Are you a sadist or a masochist?
isn't it the same thing?

"as for the questionnaire, remove all the horse kink and add more meaningful questions, like:

- what is your vision of a perfect date?
- would you rather buy flowers for your date or chocolate?
- is it normal to find the grumpy scowl on your crush's face as endearing?"

MEGUMI

[gavehead]

1. What is your name and age?
Fushiguro Megumi

2. Where are you from?
Tokyo, Japan (not this Tokyo)

3. List three of your favorite hobbies:
reading, training, grooming my dog and rabbits

4. Do you like horses?
they're okay

5. Who is your favorite philosopher?
not that interested in philosophy; too theoretical

6. Do you like to play games that require both intelligence and strategy?
yes

7. Would you like the shit beat out of you every once in awhile?
...sure, yes

8. Do you think horses are cool?
they're okay

9. Are you a top or a bottom?
i'm ranked second overall among the student body

10. Do you think horses are the absolute shit?
they shit a lot

11. Are puppets cool?
when used appropriately

12. List your top 3 fetishes:
the hell kind of questionnaire is this?

13. If you had a choose between a gun and a sword, which would you choose? sword.

14. Are horses the best animal in existence?
dogs, actually.

15. Are you a sadist or a masochist?
reform incrementalist.

"is it a requirement for the questionnaire? what's the real reason for the questions, are you looking for someone in particular?"

RAIDOU

[gavehead]

1. What is your name and age? - Raidou Kuzunoha XIV, 19 years old.
2. Where are you from? - The Capital, Japan, 1922.
3. List three of your favorite hobbies: Cooking, gardening, reading
4. Do you like horses? 🐴 - I do.
5. Who is your favorite philosopher? - I'm not sure I've considered it before.
6. Do you like to play games that require both intelligence and strategy? - I do.
7. Would you like the shit beat out of you every once in awhile? - If you mean sparring, yes.
8. Do you think horses are cool? - They're good.

No further responses.

"NO RESPONSE."

YUJI

[gavehead]

1. What is your name and age?
yuji itadori, 17

2. Where are you from?
sendai, japan

3. List three of your favorite hobbies:
movies, karaoke and sparring

4. Do you like horses?
sure, i think they're cool

5. Who is your favorite philosopher?
what's a philosopher

6. Do you like to play games that require both intelligence and strategy?
sometimes, but i like most games

7. Would you like the shit beat out of you every once in awhile?
i dont know if i'd like it but it happens anyway

8. Do you think horses are cool?
didn't you ask that already

9. Are you a top or a bottom?
????

10. Do you think horses are the absolute shit?
stop asking me about horses

11. Are puppets cool?
sometimes
12. List your top 3 fetishes:
???

13. If you had a choose between a gun and a sword, which would you choose?
sword

14. Are horses the best animal in existence?
dude.

15. Are you a sadist or a masochist?
DON'T ASK ME ABOUT THAT

Yuji has nothing else to add.

YUGAMU

[gavehead]

1. What is your name and age?
Yugamu Omokage, I'm 17, but I turn 18 soon! January 31st.

2. Where are you from?
The Tokyo Residential Complex (TRC)

3. List three of your favorite hobbies:
Dissection, Biochemical research, reading (romance novels)

4. Do you like horses? 🐴
Horses are pretty interesting animals!

5. Who is your favorite philosopher?
I don't know any philosophers but Dirk talks about it so I guess he's my favorite.

6. Do you like to play games that require both intelligence and strategy?
Sure! I don't have a lot of experience with games but this sounds like a complicated puzzle sort of game which are definitely fun.

7. Would you like the shit beat out of you every once in awhile?
100%

8. Do you think horses are cool?
Isn't this the same as 4? Same answer.

9. Are you a top or a bottom?
Either!

10. Do you think horses are the absolute shit?
There are animals I like more than horses, sorry.

11. Are puppets cool?
Puppets can be extremely uncanny and I think that's a lot of fun.

12. List your top 3 fetishes:
I can't go giving all my intimate secrets away for free (●´艸｀)ヾ

13. If you had a choose between a gun and a sword, which would you choose?
Sword.

14. Are horses the best animal in existence?
See #10.

15. Are you a sadist or a masochist?
Yes ❤️❤️❤️

"I'll poison anyone else that was sent this survey if it'll help my chances."

END

[gavehead]

Now that I have presented options, what do you think?

@that'shumerus (like two hours after the survey)

[vivisexual]

Can you come to the hallway outside the Redemption dorms right now?

[gavehead]

_{[ He is concerned this has something to do with that, but he's going to hope it doesn't. ]}

Hey, man.
You good?

12-03-2279

[horologe]

hey
guess what chucklefuck
its the big 1203
the date of the the gate to party town have been thrown open wide
roads lined with partygoers hootin and hollerin like we were royals on a procession
strutting down the red carpet with our little party boy hats cocked all jauntily like to one side throwing alms and blessings like confetti
some little dude comes running up to present unto me like a gift most holy a shining scoll of proclamation
and when i whip it open theres like that snap of pennants in the wind
and the whole neighborhood hushes and leans in to listen
as i death metal scream to the congregation
its us
we are the birthday boys its us

[gavehead]

<sub>[ Maybe somebody else would read this text like "wtf" but Dirk is already pretty accustomed to how Dave talks.

It does earn a small smile, even if he isn't really sure how to smile normally yet. ]</sub>

Fuck me sideways and shove a sword up my ass.
Where does the time go?
You should know. You're the time guy.

Wanna do something?

( ACTION. ) 11.15

[gavehead]

<sub>[ So that was it. It was his turn to take Yugamu on a date, and even if he had hoped he could plot and plan further to make it perfect, Dirk could not say no to the invitation to pierce him at his tattoo shop. A small improvising. He could make this work and impress him; show him he is also serious.

He hears cheery voice as he enters he feels his stomach flutter. Wasn't this too soon for that? Fuck it. He didn't care.

He emerges out of the little personal room of his to greet Yugamu, settling his hand on his waist. Looks like his glasses are missing again. ]</sub>

You sure you're ready? Might get kind of intense.

[vivisexual]

[Hal still in the doghouse... Yugamu files a little mental note to follow up on that later, but for now he doesn't want to push it too much especially since he likes it a lot better when he can see Dirk's pretty eyes. The color on his face deepens with the hand on his waist. It feels gently possessive and he really wants to feel like territory someone needs to defend.]

You should know by now that intense is my favorite way for things to be!

[That's why he likes you so much.]

Backdated to December 3rd

[vivisexual]

[In the morning, Dirk will find a note slipped under his door;]

Hey Birthday Boy ♥

If you're free, come meet me in the training arena. I have something for you.

Love,
Yugamu

[gavehead]

_{[ well, say no more. He's definitely captchaloging his sword and wearing his glasses today; it doesn't take him anytime to head towards the arena, but he shoots a text to Yugamu while he makes his way there. ]}

Is this a bootycall or what?
Your handwriting is cute, by the way.

before mt. fuji, dirk's room; night-time

[horologe]

[ dave walks like a fucking ninja all the damn time, even when they're out and about, which is to say that there is nary a noise to herald his coming when a cold can of soda materializes to press against dirk's delicate dweeb cheek. ]

[gavehead]

_{[ yeah no he is ninja grabbing Dave by the wrist the second that thing touches his face... karate grip. These ninja boys. ]}

I ain't asleep. What's up?

February 14th

[vivisexual]

[Relatively early in the morning because he thinks that's the best chance he has of catching Dirk at his room, here's Yugamu knocking at his dorm room door.]

pookie....

[gavehead]

<sub>[ You know, it's still so weird that he has a door to answer now. Back home, the doors were shut tight to prevent any drones from making their way into his high rise apartment, but he's getting used to it all between Yugamu and Dave visiting him constantly.

The door opens, and his room is a cluttery mess, surprisingly, but he's as pristine looking as ever. ]</sub>

Hey, man. What's up?